What do they sell there?

Sage and Paul are at the community centre.

Paul Mama, look at this strange thing. What is it?

Sage Ooo, what is that? It’s interesting, isn’t it?

Nearby Boy That’s a hockey mask.

Sage Oh, I see. [tries it on Paul] And I guess you put it on like that. I don’t really see how it protects -

Nearby Boy, appalled It’s BROKEN.

Sage That explains it.

Todd is at the government run LCBO (Liquor Control Board of Ontario) with a co-worker.

Co-worker So, what kind of champagne should we get to celebrate the project?

Todd Um, sorry - I don’t really know. I don’t drink.

Co-worker You don’t? We’ll have to get you something non-alcoholic for the party, then. Excuse me, clerk? Can you tell us where to find the non-alcoholic drinks?

Clerk You may have noticed the word LIQUOR at the beginning of our store name, sir.

Sage and Paul are on the bus.

Paul I see a store called Tim Horton’s. What do they sell there?

Sage Donuts.

Paul What’s a donut?

Sage It’s fried up dough, covered in sugar.

Paul Mmmm. Can we try one?

Sage We can split one. They’re really not good for your body. But we’ll have a special occasion, okay?

Paul Okay!

Sometimes I wonder what the Canadians make of us.