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Santa Claus Man
Stickers are a popular form of graffiti in Toronto. Todd calls them “Canadian graffiti”, because they’re so easy for the city workers to scrape off later. On my way up the escalator I saw a sticker on the wall which read: MY GENDER HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH YOUR SHAME.
Ha ha haaaaaaaaaaa.
Although I see him around every once in awhile, it wasn’t until Sunday that I had another close encounter with Santa Claus Man.
The subway car pulled into the station and he ran for the doors at the last minute, jumping in and shouting, “Yes yes YEEEEEES!” as he flexed his muscles and nodded frantically. People watched, bemused, as he strode up and down the subway car, projecting as he spoke.
“It’s me again! Grrrrrr, grrrrrr. People think I’m a character, a nutcase. Yes yes YEEEEEES. I’m not crazy. Everyone knows about me. On the internet, on television, in the newspaper. Grrrrrr, grrrrrr.” He paused to do twelve perfect pushups, then continued, taking off his jacket and pointing to his perfect stomach. “Check it OUT. Yes yes YEEEEEES.” As we pulled into the next stop, he leaped off the subway car, stopping in the middle of the platform, throwing out his arms and screaming, “Merry Christmas! YES! Grrrrrr, grrrrrr!”
You know, the first time I met Santa Claus Man, I was sure he was a crackpot. This time? It could have been a bid for attention, or performance art. It could have been a very long-term psychology experiment culminating in a thesis on the way people react to insanity if it comes in a Hollywood moviestar package.
But maybe that’s just because he was wearing pants this time.
Santa visits us every year at work. A cow orker dresses as Santa (full garb, real beard, bleaches hair, the whole noodle) and visits every cubicle, leaving a candy cane for each person. We’re talking over 500 people. He loves his job.
A few weeks back we had a job posting (in both official languages) get emailed to everyone in our division. The job - to be Santa at the company’s Childrens’ Christmas Party. I just looked through my email and unfortunately I don’t have a copy - it was quite funny houw (jokingly) seriously it was writing.
Ron dresses up like Santa for Emma. She knows it is him and aksed him to do it.
You know, RON. The skinny short guy. he makes one awesome Santa though.
Hey look - there’s a fair bit of info as to who “Zanta” is in this article.